With the second weekend of the RWC bringing us the biggest shock result of the tournament, attention turned to Fortress Failand and the visiting Coney Hill. The new tradition of music in the changing rooms was updated this week to include double speakers, if only to allow the Japanese national anthem to be played for Kyle and Pikey. The morning result was taken in good grace with the reasoning that the Irish ‘allowed’ this result to ensure the tournament opened up for all spectators. For the first time this season OBs were out first warming up with Coney stood around watching, getting in a last minute smoke potentially showing the focus of the visitors was not all on playing rugby.

Pre-game chat provided by Hunty was to "be more Japan", although the writer is still not sure what that entails, and Shane decided we could go off record and forget frames for the afternoon. With these words of wisdom to consider OBs fielded the kick off and immediately knocked on to continue our excellent restart work this season.

Whether it’s the fact I took a knock to the head during the game or the general accumulation, little memory resides of the actual game. The highlight of the half came through Captain Joe’s audition for the round ball sport with a brush to the chest and subsequent dive in front of the ref. Half time came around with OBs 27-0 up and 5 tries to the good achieved through dominance in the scrum and line out and Hunty declaring the game was won by this point.

Unfortunately, Coney Hill also decided that the game of rugby was over during the second half with the only intent to start a mass brawl. Coney Hill finally got their wish in the most innocuous of situations with debutant Jonny taking the ball into contact sparking what must have been a premeditated move by the visitors to get everyone in swinging. With the return of the Royal Oak there could have been a worry that the OBs of old would also reappear and stand around watching one guy get beaten up, instead everyone decided it would be best to pile in.

JD was mistaken as the original instigator, leading to the Coney winger running across the field in front of the ref to throw a couple of haymakers. On regaining some semblance of order the ref called over the captains with the decision that Coney’s 13 had run from slightly further away to throw punches and so only he required a red. Baffling but apparently I’d already used up my 'question the ref card' for the day so couldn’t enquire over the conclusion.

To gain some semblance of control, what looked like an easy 3 in front of the sticks was taken and missed much to the derision of the visitors who thought their sister could do better. Further great chat from the opposition included ‘we’re only 18’, ‘you’re all old’ which, much like their game plan, had little impact. Three tries were all OBs managed in amongst the brawling with the best going to Jack Phat Hands running the length of the field making up for his earlier penalty miss and general kicking return of 2/9.

Overall a very good team result and performance from what I remember of the day, followed by an excellent turn out of 1s by all except Kyle who supposedly had not been told this was to be enforced, else he would have told the missus to pack his bag accordingly.

Final Score: OBs 44-0 Coney Hill
Tries: Clarke; G Hazell; Coughlan; Hernandez; Price (2); Law; Duncan
Cons: Price (2)
Pens: Price (0)
BOG: Law

2nd XV: OBs 0-10 Nailsea & Backwell

[Ed. - Cam has eschewed responsibility for preparing this match report and has said, in writing, that he would prefer to defend himself in court.

Final Score: OBs 0-10 Nailsea & Backwell
Tries: -
Cons: -
BOG: The Ghost of Cam